Thank you, Juan Valdez

Coffee is a wonderful thing. It wakes you up. It increases your energy. It tastes delicious. It is, in the immortal words of my friend Jason, whom I used to work with many years ago in Toronto, "sweet elixir of life*."

It makes 5 a.m. seem a little bit sunnier, a little more bearable. I usually drink three cups between the time I get up and the time I arrive at work. (Thanks for the travel cup, Mum!)

I found out yesterday, however, just how important coffee is. I found out that unbeknownst to me, it is a big part of what makes me me -- part of the essential core of my being and what defines me as a person. At least according to Rachel.

We were driving home from daycare yesterday evening and she was telling me all about a project that she's doing at school. She said that each student in the class had to pick a 'character' from their family and describe them. (Great, my eight-year-old thinks I'm a character.) They had to list four things about their character that described them.

Here are the words and phrases that Rae feels describe me best:

• dirty blonde
• nice
• generous
• three cups of coffee

Three cups of coffee. Not that I'm tall, or that I'm fun, or that I bake amazing cinnamon buns, but 'three cups of coffee.' I did get 'nice' and 'generous', which is better than the perhaps more accurate 'grouchy' and 'nagging.'

And really, I should be grateful that the last bullet point she chose wasn't 'three glasses of merlot.'




*from the opening line of a poem Jason wrote me about coffee on a sheet of lined paper in bright green ink. I still have it somewhere. I miss him. We once went Christmas shopping together at the Eaton Centre inebriated (on public transportation, of course), and someday I really must tell you about Jason and the birth control pills, it's a good story.

Crazy old lady warning signs

This morning I caught myself having a long conversation with Angus, conducted entirely (on my part) in high-pitched baby talk. He meowed back very sweetly. I said a lot of things like, "Oh him is a pretty, pretty boy, him is!" and "Oh, who has the cutest little fuzzy tummy?"

Can unfortunate flowered blouses and tea cups full of gin be far behind?

Sweet dreams are made of this

I've run out of things to blog about, and so, poor readers, you get to hear about the dream I had a few nights ago,

I dreamed that I ran into Peter Mansbridge on the Toronto subway and since he looked familiar, I figured he was one of the geologists from work. I kept asking him when he was going to submit his map for editing. He had to show me a picture of Cynthia Dale before I'd believe him about who he was. I was very embarrassed about the mix up, and tried to save face by pretending that I needed to get off at the next station, but I tripped and dropped the grocery bag I was carrying, showering him and the subway car with grapefruits and cheese.

But what did it mean? Strangely, I couldn't find this scenario on the dream interpretation website:

Sorry, there are no matches for your request. For best results, narrow your search request to one or two words.

So I did.

Subway

To dream that you are in the subway implies that you are attaining your objectives without having to use much physical effort. You are discovering your inner spirituality and personality. It may also mean that you are being too impulsive and you should think carefully before making a decision.

Press

To see the press in your dream suggests your being aware of what’s happening around you and getting involved. Dreaming of press conveys what you discern about your surroundings.
To dream of the press chasing you indicates that someone may be intruding into your private life.

Office

A dream involving your work office suggests difficulty in leaving your work. This may represent the possibility of being preoccupied with work and having too much office work to accomplish. It may also stand for your position, achievements and status in society.

Cheese

To see cheese in your dream in an indication that you may soon find yourself a recipient of substantial wealth, rewards, or benefits. You may be elevated to a higher social status or a higher level of importance.

Grapefruit

To dream that you are eating grapefruit indicates that you feel recharged and fresh mentally. You are happier lately as a result of a boost in energy and spirits.To dream about a grapefruit tree represents your abilities, your faith and morals, and the good things you do. It could also indicate the 'fruits' of your effort.

So if I cobble that all together, I'm impusive and overworked, yet aware of my surroundings and recharged mentally and about to be elevated to a higher social status. That doesn't sound good, except for the last part.

Or maybe I just like cheese, and fell asleep with The National on the TV while thinking of the map I'm working on at the office.

I still can't explain the grapefruit, though.

According to Rachel

In which Rachel blows off an entire subcontinent

Rachel (singing the song from Lady and the Tramp): 'This is the night, it's a beautiful night, and they call it bella notte.' You know, that's the only Indian I know.
Leah: It's not Indian, it's Italian.
Rae: Same thing.
Leah (a mite sarcastically): I think there's a couple of million Indians who probably wouldn't agree with you.
Rae: Whatever.

Rachel, queen of the metaphor. Or simile. I can never get those straight.

Rachel, frustrated because whenever she invites a friend over to play, the friend inevitably gravitates to older sister Leah:
"It's like Leah's a fridge, and all my friends are magnets."

On the subject of cleaning up the toys in the basement

Rae: The basement looks fine. It's not like the Queen is coming over, or Josie, or Marsha Stewart.

Lest we forget

In Flanders Fields

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

— John McCrae 1915

Please take some time this Remembrance Day to reflect on the sacrifices made by our Canadian Armed Forces and Peacekeepers, and to pay tribute to all those who died in war.

At the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month, the time the Armistice of World War I was signed in 1918, we observe two minutes of silence to remember. We remember those lost in both World Wars, Korea, and the men and women serving today in Afghanistan.

They deserve no less.

Hero/Sidekick

Batman and Robin

Lucy and Ethel

Timmy and Lassie

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson

Radioactive Man and Fallout Boy


Evil Ninja Assassin Cat and Henchkitten

Is there a Wednesday fetish I don't know about?

Easton, Pennsylvania; Austin, Texas (twice); Cortlandt Manor, New York; Boston, Massachusetts; Melbourne, Australia; unidentified city in Mexico; Ankara, Turkey; Denver, Colorado; Jamaica, New York; Toronto, Ontario; Jensen Beach, Florida; Budapest, Hungary; Flagstaff, Arizona; Portland, Oregon; Topeka, Kansas; San Diego, California; York, Pennsylvania; Karlsruhe, Germany; Brampton, Ontario; Evreux, France; Richmond, Virginia; Boynton Beach, Florida...

What do all of these cities have in common?

Over the last few days, someone from each of those cities came to my blog through a Google search that landed them on this page. And, since the search term was either Wednesday or Wednesday Addams, they were either looking for this:



Or this:

I don't know which is more disturbing.

In the past week or so, my traffic has doubled, and most of the increase is looking for Wednesday. Is there some kind of pop-culture significance I'm missing here, or is it a coincidence that such a geographically diverse group of people just want to look at pictures of either a slutty Halloween costume or a seven-year-old girl?

Any thoughts?