Apparently, I need an attitude adjustment -- from a nicotine patch

Rachel and I had an argument last night at bedtime. We were both yelling a bit, sad to say. She was using every trick to stall and delay and she was overtired and petulant and Leah had been in bed for half an hour and I was tired after a long day of work and I just wanted her to get into bed and stay there. She wanted...well, I'm not sure she even knew what she wanted, but getting out of bed was right up there.

Rachel divides the world into 2 camps: those who are nice (i.e. giving in to her every whim) and those who are mean (i.e. not giving in to her every whim). She was so angry she was sobbing and telling me how mean I was being, insisting that she stay in bed at 8 p.m. -- well, actually it was 8:30 by this point (the NERVE of me, don't you think?). I tried to give her a hug to calm things down, and she recoiled from me, shrieking, "You are a bad mommy. You are the meanest mommy in the world. *You* need some Nicoderm!"

It took me a second, and then I cracked up. Have you seen the commercial for Nicoderm with the irritable flight attendant? Click here if you haven't.

In Rae's literal little mind, the commercial says that Nicoderm is something you give to mean people so that they are nice again.

And I don't even smoke.