Friday, January 28, 2011

According to Rachel, January 2011 edition

In the car the other night, driving back from visiting friends, talking about summer camps to Leah.

Me: And they have all kinds of camps. They even have a C.S.I. camp where you learn detective techniques!

Leah: Cool!

Rachel [sounding very adult and world-weary]: That would be the Village of Yawn for me.

Me: . . . . *hysterical laughter*

Rachel [sounding disgruntled]: What?

Me: Where did you hear that?

Rae [sounding defensive]: Nowhere. I was just trying to say that it sounds boring.

Me: Well, you did a pretty good job.

(I am totally going to use this from now on whenever something is boring: "Are you going to the legend committee meeting, Alison?" "Yep, I'm heading out to the Village of Yawn." )


  1. HA! She sounds like a little hipster :)


  2. I don't think you've given the Village of Yawn a fair shot. For a start, there's:

    * The museum of very very dull stuff, open every fifth Sunday unless there's an R in the month

    * A village shop with seventeen different types of washing up liquid

    * A playground with three sticks, one spring and a (deflated) ball.

  3. Rae is so damn funny.

    Love Jen's idea for the Village of Yawn.

  4. Meanie - Some days I think she's the reincarnation of Dorothy Parker, or Attila the Hun.

    UK Jen - Excellent! I'm giggling up a storm here.

    US Jen - UK Jen is v. v. funny!

  5. Oh my god alison, shes for sure going to be on tv one day, she makes me laugh.

  6. wooh hoo it finally didnt say i was anonymous, maybe i learned how to blog lol.

  7. Hey, Rae started the ball rolling but:

    *The Red Yawn - the village pub which only sells one type of non-alcoholic beer, doesn't allow chatter but does allow darts.

    *Village of Yawn Primary School - students only learn maths

    *Yawn Hairdressers - every cut's a mullet

    *Church of St Yawn - services are four hours long, no singing, hymnals are in 5pt type

    *village square statue - to Sir Henry of Yawn, famous...for yawning

  8. Adding to U.K. Jen's comment:

    The Red Yawn does have a telly, but it only shows cricket.

    The Yawn Movie Theatre -- the movies are of things like cows chewing their cud and grass growing.

    The Yawn Boutique -- all the clothes are in earth tones, with no patterns or interesting details.

    The Yawn Gazette -- publishes things like crop reports, high school math test scores, and occasionally ponders the meaning of life in the editorial columns.

  9. Anonymous2:02 PM

    The village of Yawn...

    OK, I need to use this. This expression could take over the world!

    - Jazz

  10. US Jen - loving the Gazette and the cricket in the pub!

  11. Kim - I hope she ends up on tv. But not on a reality show.

    Jens - You guys are cracking me up! LOL at the Red Yawn/cricket/Church of St. Yawn. Do you suppose the Church has a Women's group that meets to discuss the village fĂȘte which will consist of one coconut shy and rides on an arthritic donkey?

  12. Jazz - Maybe you can use it so that it goes viral in Montréal!!

  13. 'Ville de bailler'?

  14. Village of Yawn. Can I steal that?

  15. Allison - I think it loses a little in translation.

    Apathy - By all means. It's very descriptive. I wonder if I should worry that there's that deep level of sarcasm in my 8-year-old.

  16. Hello:

    A bit of a parallel. I am a divorced full time father of 2 boys. Also 47. Also, to some small extent, a blogger.

    It seems to be on car rides, at restaurants, or at the dinner table that my sons come up with the laest and best sayings. They are kind enough to explain them but not without the odd eye roll or exasperated hiss.